In a brief survey, a peer group obtained through an online network and common workplace were asked a series of questions about their views on cheating and polyamorous relationships.  The respondents consisted of 13 females and 12 males and ranged in age from 22 to 56.  All were of similar higher education and computer experience.  The marital status, sexual orientation, and race were disregarded in this survey.

When asked if “being cheated on by a partner is a forgivable offense” 12 said “no” and 13 said “yes.”  Out of the 12 who said “no,” 7 were female and 5 were male and out of the 13 who said “yes” 7 were male and 6 were female.  The almost even split possibly shows that the toleration level for infidelity between males and females is about the same.

When asked why, however, out of the 12 who said cheating was not forgivable, 9 said it was because the trust was broken, 1 said the “dynamics of the relationship is destroyed,” and 2 said it was “disrespectful.” 

The yes group answers varied more but not by much.  Out of the 13 who said cheating is a forgivable offense, 4 said cheating indicates “unhappiness in the relationship,” 3 said “people make mistakes,” 2 said it is forgivable if there is a promise “it will never happen again,” and 2 said “we’re human.”  1 said “everyone deserves a second chance” and 1 said it “depends on the context of the cheating.”

When asked if they “have cheated or have ever been cheated on” 8 out of 12 from the no group had experience with cheating and 11 out of 13 in the yes group had experience with cheating.  It appears that even though 19 out of the 25 people had been cheated on or cheated on someone that the forgiveness factor still comes out about even.  However, out of the 13 females in the survey 11 admitted to having experience with cheating and out of the 12 males in the survey only 8 admitted to experience with cheating.  In the past, it was less likely for a female to admit her indiscretions due to the repercussions she might endure from society.  Perhaps, the high numbers of those admitting experience with cheating implies that it has become more acceptable in American society to not only cheat but to admit it as well (Drigotas, Barta, 178).