By Dreama & Joel

           It was about 9:30pm February 11, 2006 when I finally got Joel on the phone.   “Hello,” I sang, “Where have you been all this time?”

           “Hey, baby,” he said in an unusually raspy voice.  “I was just getting ready to leave…can I call you back tomorrow?”

           “Hell no!”  I yelled.  “I’ve been trying to get a hold of you for months!  Where have you been?  You sound awful!”

           “Out.”

           “Out?  Why are you in such a mood?”

           “I have been having the most wonderful time with -- do you remember that 45-year-old divorcee with the hair and the mean look?” 

           At this point I realized we had lapsed into the script of Hedwig and the Angry Inch.  What had taken over the ol' boy?  “Joel!"  I shouted.  "What the hell are you talking about?”

           He laughed then and began a most interesting story…